Friday, November 2, 2012

you know you've been to uganda when...


My teammates and I put together this list when we were sitting in the Addis Ababa airport for three hours. Feel free to add more if you've been to Uganda too!
  • You respond to people calling you "muzungu"
  • You start calling other people "muzungus"
  • You get excited to see other muzungus when in town
  • You crave chocolate milkshakes
  • You don't quite have the conversion to shillings down yet
  • You never want to see rice or peas again
  • The Islamic call to worship is your alarm clock
  • You sweat even when you aren't hot
  • Your intestines have stopped working for at least a week
  • You have shared a shower with bats and rats
  • You have shared your bed with roaches
  • You have gone through a pint of hand sanitizer in a day
  • You know that mosquito nets are used to keep out all kinds of insects and rodents - not just mosquitos
  • You don't get nervous when you see a car coming straight towards you at 90mph
  • You have brushed your teeth with pink lemonade because you ran out of bottled water
  • You walk bow-legged because your thighs have chafed together from walking so much in the heat
  • You are not offended if someone calls you fat
  • You have at least one suitcase full of beaded jewelry and you left all of your belongings behind
  • You can count up to five in Lugandan
  • Every morning you ask, "What was that screaming noise last night?"
  • You are used to hearing strange sounds coming from the trees
  • Your idea of a gourmet meal is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich
  • You are used to seeing goats strapped on the back of motorcycles
  • Personal space no longer exists and there is no such thing as privacy
  • You stop wearing makeup because you're used to just sweating it off
  • Coca-Cola is your drug of choice
  • One of your friends is an unofficial pharmacist
  • You run late in the States because you're used to being on African time
  • You want to scream whenever someone asks you if you got to meet Katie while you were there
  • You iron your underwear because you're afraid of mango flies
  • You've been a passenger in a vehicle that has the same name as the driver
  • You expect church services to be at least four hours long
  • Shrubs are the new clothesline/dryer
  • Your feet are permanently red
  • You aren't phased when all of your questions are answered by, "Yes"
  • You expect to be greeted by song wherever you go
  • You are used to being called "Mama" or "Auntie"
  • Before using the restroom at a hotel or restaurant, you always ask someone if you can flush the toilet paper
  • Before eating the food at a hotel or restaurant, you always ask if you can eat the fresh vegetables
  • Your fingernails are always dirty
  • You carry a roll of toilet paper with you wherever you go
  • You are afraid of getting arrested if you take pictures of tourist attractions
  • You can play "Letter of the Day" for hours on end
  • When a policeman asks if you're carrying any arms, you hold your arms in the air
  • When you go volunteer somewhere and expect to spend the afternoon picking rocks and beetles out of the rice
  • You have masted the art of cloth diapers -- or you swear to never use them
  • You have used your hand as a wipe when changing diapers
  • You swear that the best oranges are green
  • When you're out with friends and it threatens to rain, you leave early so that you don't have to push your car home in the mud
  • You try to entertain teenagers by showing them what tricks you can do with various body parts
  • You are used to sleeping on styrofoam "pillows"
  • Your personal speed limit when driving is: "if you survive, you're okay"
  • You get laughed at all the time because you love your pets
  • You expect to see your neighbor taking their goat or cow for a walk on a leash
  • You expect a sunset cruise to involve a ten foot motor boat in the middle of the afternoon in 110*F weather
  • Airplane bathrooms seem luxurious

2 comments:

  1. hahaha! I love this Lauren! The other thing I could add based on personal experience is that you start to answer questions with a "mm" grunt and raised eyebrows----and a you get a few weird looks :)
    Love you friend!
    -Lexie

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  2. some of these are hysterical love you

    ReplyDelete